Magic at the checkpoint

I’m flying home from Seattle this morning, and I had an experience at the TSA security checkpoint that can only be described as magical.

I didn’t have to remove my shoes.
I didn’t have to take my laptop out of my bag.
I didn’t have to empty my pockets.
I didn’t have to opt out of the full-body scanner.
I didn’t have to be subjected to a full-body groping.

The reason? I don’t actually know. Seatac has the full-body scanners, and many passengers were being routed through them, so I’d already steeled myself for the exciting experience of explaining that I don’t want to go through them, and being pulled aside for an embarrassing and ultimately pointless pat-down.

Maybe I was routed to an “express lane” or something like that. Regardless, it was really nice to breeze through a metal detector, grab my bags, and go.

Upon reflection, the tragedy in all of this is the fact that something so simple can change my travel experience for the day. I despise air travel, mostly because the TSA treats everyone like criminals, but also because the airlines seem to do their very best to make flights uncomfortable, remove even the tiniest perks, and charge for literally everything. Everyone– including the TSA itself– knows that the current state of airport security is nothing more than theater. Why can’t we all just use a metal detector for passengers and an x-ray machine for bags, and call it a day?