Back in fall 2018, I was captain of an amazing ultimate league team. Although our official team name was Final Fancy D (based on the league theme), one of the guys on the team saw some t-shirts at Walmart that had sloths on them. Don’t ask. So about half of us bought these cheap shirts, and our unofficial team name was The Sloths. Not impressive for an ultimate team, I know, but it was hilarious.
Somehow, during the season we developed a tradition of writing poetry in our team-wide emails. After games I’d send out some “feel good” vibes (we weren’t a very strong team) and it became a running joke. Even after the season was over, the poetry exchange continued. We’d even meet up at a Boulder dive bar now and then, even though we were no longer on a team together.
Here we are, a year and a half later, and one of the guys just sent a team-wide email:
Ok everyone, throw in your best poem that you can come up with. The theme of the poem is………..(random spinner)………… how you got into ultimate. Go!
I couldn’t resist, so I just spent about half an hour composing an epic poem on par with Homer’s Odyssey. Here it is, including a bunch of inside jokes:
‘Twas the fall of ‘ninety, so long ago,
(Some of you weren’t even born, I know).
I had a friend who said one day
“Let’s go out– I’ve got a game to play!”
We went to a park near the college dorm
We stretched and worked on our throwing form.
He told us the rules, but we had no clue
About stacks or forces or what to do.
One endzone was a pair of oak trees
Whose branches snagged discs caught by the breeze.
The other end was an old swingset
Was it ghetto? That’s a sure bet.
At the edge of the field was a big lake
And many a throw the water did take.
On the other side was a city street.
(As you can tell, our setup was sweet!)
It didn’t matter, ’cause we still had fun
Chasing plastic under a Missouri sun.
I’m sure you can guess, but I’ll confirm the news:
That’s when I started wearing no shoes.
Five years in college, though we had no team;
Just a bunch of guys living the dream.
We learned some moves and tricks of the trade,
And definitely loved every moment we played.
Then off to Colorado, Aurora in fact,
With a pickup gang that’s still intact.
Moving to Boulder introduced me to GRU,
Where of course I eventually met all of you.
Brenda was with me on team Puppy Chow,
A shocking twenty years before now.
So many leagues, so many friends,
I was sad that it all had to come to an end.
Hanging on my wall is a special gift
And when I see it, my spirit lifts.
Kyle and Jordan gave it to me
On my last day in GRU: the summer tourney.
But never fear, I haven’t hung up my cleats!
One day I’ll be back, bringing some treats.
Maybe we’ll hit the Dark Horse Saloon,
Hoisting a Pepsi while Lev sings a tune.
Thanks to Matt for reminding me
How bad I am at writing poetry.
Always remember: of all the teams I’ve seen,
Y’all are still in my top eighteen.
Ahh, fond memories. Thanks, Matt, for making me write one more poem.