Month: February 2007

Do you suppose the flight attendants gave a cheery “Thanks for flying Northwest Airlines!” salute as the passengers left the plane?

This is the kind of thing we need to see now and again…

Another “funny because it’s true”…

“If all else fails, escape to Canada. No one hates Canada. Hating Canada would be like hating toast.”

— Zippo, on Digg, discussing how to avoid terrorist attacks

— Senator Barack Obama, October 26, 2002

My job this week has been one disaster after another. It’s amazing how many things can go wrong– seemingly all at once. I’ve been working twelve- and fourteen-hour days every day, staying up until two in the morning and hitting the computer again at eight or nine. I think I’ve burned out, and then gone beyond that into a realm of major suckiness.

This funny little graphic pretty much sums up my feeling about work right now.

I just booked a flight to Seattle, and of course as part of the whole ticketing process I’m encouraged to visit the TSA web site and learn more about the exciting ways my government is taking away my freedoms. Whee!

So, being in a feisty mood, I reaffirmed that I can, indeed, board an airplane without photo ID (which I fully intend to do). I then decided to take a look at the list of items allowed on the plane. At Denver International Airport, there’s a big glass display case near the check-in counter where you can see samples of things that are strictly prohibited. A few years ago there was– no kidding– a chainsaw in the case. That can only mean someone actually attempted to board a plane somewhere with a chainsaw. Sadly, it’s been removed, but the last time I was at the airport (a few months ago) there was a hand grenade. Ha ha! Those goofy TSA guys– always playing pranks by telling us we can’t bring a live grenade onto a plane.

Anyway, here’s a helpful list of items the TSA allows on flights:

I can imagine someone might want to bring an ice axe on a trip– heck, I brought some hiking poles on my last trip, and they have rather sharp points. I also brought an eight-inch buck knife. All of it was in my backpack, which was of course checked. But hey, now I know that I can not only bring my meat cleaver, but even my saber and trusty sword. Woo hoo!

I guess those people going to Renaissance Festivals in other states, or those other people who re-enact Civil War battles and such, are happy about this.

The copyright terrorists are back.

Richard Silver “invented” the Electric Slide (yes, the dance) in 1976. He copyrighted it in 2004. I didn’t even know you could copyright a dance, but apparently you can. It’s the “choreography” that’s copyright-able, and he claims that anyone who performs the Electric Slide in public owes him money for using the moves. Moreover, he’s on a crusade to sue people who do the dance incorrectly, saying they’re infringing as well.

Apparently several dancers performed the Electric Slide on the Ellen Degeneres Show last year, so Richard is suing the show. He’s also threatening everyone on YouTube who’s uploaded any form of the Electric Slide in a video. Did you have the dance at your wedding and post it to the web? Then you’re in trouble, in his book, especially if you’re not doing it right.

His ammunition for all of this is the fabulous DMCA, which is second only to the Military Commissions Act of last year in terms of Worst Legislation Ever. Here we see again how stupid these copyright laws can be.

As an interesting and sort of humorous side note, Richard says the only actor he’s seen do the Electric Slide correctly is Joe Pesci. Go figure.

My new heroes: Peter Berdovsky and Sean Stevens.

These are the guys (pictured here at their court hearing today) who placed a dozen LED lightboards on some bridges and buildings in Boston and threw the fire department into a frenzy because someone thought they were bombs. The attorney general of Massachusetts, Martha Coakley, had some harsh words:

Whoa. A battery? And– gasp– wires?

What really happened here was someone got a little more panicked than they should have, and now the city of Boston looks like a bunch of buffoons. Instead of laughing it off, they’re throwing the book at these two guys and saying they planted a “hoax bomb device” (which is a felony, apparently). In fact, they were light-up ads for a cable TV show. Admittedly, these two could be charged with littering or something, but because Boston shut down some major thoroughfares and caused huge traffic problems, the city must feel like they need to frame this as a horrible terrorist attack.

Note that similar ads have been sitting in New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, Atlanta, Seattle, Portland, Austin, San Francisco, and Philadelphia for two or three weeks. No bomb scare. No mobilization of federal anti-terrorist forces– including the U.S. Northern Command in Colorado (wow, a couple of signs scrambled the highest levels of the military?).

Probably the best part of the story (so far) is where Peter and Sean held a press conference and refused to answer any questions unless they were about hair.

What an amazing winter for Colorado. This marks the seventh straight week we’ve had snow… at least one day for each of those weeks, and in some cases (like today) more than one day.

It’s awesome. The ski resorts must be thrilled, and since I work at home I can just look out the window and pity those who have to commute everywhere…